Matters of the Heart

 Beware  "An injured friend is the bitterest of foes.”   Thomas Jefferson~




Keep your head up girl, they'll lie to your face and

talk about you behind your back.

They'll say terrible things about you and think they can

tear your world apart... all because they're jealous.

 Talk low, talk slow and don't say too much.

Feeling Crushed and Used is an awful Feeling

Hello, I hope all is well for anyone that is reading my blog.  I have had a good weekend and an awakening that I know is moving me through my walk with God.  This morning I was having a difficult time with feeling betrayed by someone that I thought was a good friend of mine; however I was stopped in the moment of my complaints.  I was replying to a message in Facebook to a woman I don't know,about my feelings of  unforgiveness, she knows of this particular friend. I realized it wasn't right for me to carry on like a fool to someone I don't know well with my problems, and I instantly was brought to my senses and then tears came to my eyes as I began to humble.  No doubt the work of God. :) 

Jesus was betrayed by a friend, so
He knows what it's like--and yet
He always is ready to forgive.

Since then I have made myself right with God and immediately retracted my senseless venting of someone else's troubles.  God commands us to love even our enemies and to not bear a secret to another, less we be put to shame.  Thank God for His leading all of my life to desire His word, because had I not had the word of God on the tables of my heart, I would probably not be so quick to stop and allow the Lord to work in all of our hearts.  :)

It wasn't an hour after I gave it all to God and decided to allow Him to work out the best for everyone, I received some information that convinced me that He is busy at work to secure His best interests for all of us. Praise God for all of His wondrous works of miracles and His mercy that endures forever!!  Please be in prayer for me that I continue to listen to my heart as it is being softened to God's ways.

Anyhow, I am feeling good knowing that we will see the good things from God as we learn to submit to His ways and His time.  It's time to concentrate on what's best to keeping positive and connecting with our inner girl.  Sometimes as a girl we experience broken days and dirty windows.  Have you ever tried looking out of a dirty window?  It's frustrating because the view is not as clear as it could be.  If we simply try to wipe the window it often becomes   streaked and makes the view worse, if not blurry.  It takes time to clean a window to where it's clear as a picture, and the contents of what we are viewing become as clear as a picture speaking a thousand words.

Here is a great dialogue I discovered from a group of youth authors at Teen Fiction Cafe'

We've all known someone like this - they say they are your friend, but they talk behind your back. They suck up all the attention and energy wherever they go. They are always seeking favors from you (that's what friends are for, right?) but disappear the second you need help. They say things to cut you down (often followed by "just kidding!")Why do we put up with these kinds of friends?

I have learned a lot from the experience

For anyone who has reason to question if their friends are really their friends, here are some good indicators that they aren't -

1. You can't be yourself around them - you feel you have to act, dress, talk, etc. like them to be accepted.

2. They gossip about other people when you're with them. (A sure indicator of what they do behind your back when you're not there.) Worse, you find yourself gossiping more when you're with them, too.

3. They make passive/aggressive comments about your accomplishments, likes, desires so you feel like you have to downplay yourself to be more like them. You notice yourself moving further away from your goals.

4. Your self-esteem is tied to what they think/say about you. You give them power to control your moods.

5. They isolate you. You start to distance yourself from your family and other friends.

 http://teenfictioncafe.blogspot.com/2011/01/when-friends-arent.html

Taking everything one day at a time to give ourselves a chance to examine all the spots on a dirty window to determine whether we need water, ammonia or vinegar to clean it with, will allow us the time to connect with our inner girl and make sure our attitudes are ready for whatever method we need to use to gain a clear perception of any situation or circumstance.  Let the inner girly girl come out and find the innocence it requires to be forgiving and free from feeling manipulated and used; however find the courage to be strong and maintain your self respect, while being classy and fabulous. 

 MY Amazing Friends!

Paul, Me, Elizabeth, and Missi



I believe that my friends are the reason for my integrity.  They keep me honest, trustful, and whole.  I don't think I would have ever learned to be a friend, much less keep all of my friends had they not all been there with me through thick and thin keeping me grounded to a sense of ethical responsibility.  Isn't that what friends are truly for?  I believe so, and when I as a friend see one of my friends going astray I find every way I can to help her or him to see where she or he is straying away from their own integrity.  All of my true friends have done the same for me.  I say thank you to all of my wonderful friends for being apart of my life - I love you all!



Ally, Me and Colleen

 Amazing is found in Strong women with gentle hearts! 

Corrine

Sometimes the most important things that we do are things we cannot measure." ~ Jacqueline Novogratz ~
http://www.amazingwomenrock.com/ted-talks/42-thought-provoking-quotes-from-jacqueline-novogratz-founder-of-acumen-fund.html




Lori




 The best thing to hold onto in life is each other." ~ Audrey Hepburn ~

My oldest friend Kim with her husband Manuel
We have known each other since we were 3 yrs old




The mother of all girly girls Theresa





Malena



                        Those who look for beauty, find it.

   

It's beauty that captures your attention; personality which captures your heart 





Kelly



Margo with her husband William







Beauty is a fruit which we look at without trying to seize it   ~Simone Weil, Gravity and Grace ~

Laura




My friend Larry dancing at
his wedding with the most
amazing woman I know...
My Sister Karen

Melissa with her husband Daniel

 

  

 



My best friend and
my husband, Eric



 

 

 

How beautiful you are, now that you love me.

  

"For me the only things of interests are those linked to the heart" ~ Audrey Hepburn ~



Jeri Ann



Cathy



 

BEAUTY








Plain women know more about men than beautiful ones do. But beautiful women don't need to know about men. It's the men who have to know about beautiful women. ~Katharine Hepburn




Roger and Karren

Taking joy in living is a woman's best cosmetic.  ~Rosalind Russell


Bill and Kathy





He is richest who is content with the least, for content is the wealth of nature.  ~Socrates ~



Bill



I have so many amazing friends and although they are not all pictured here, this is a group of the most wonderful people in my life that I am proud to call my friends.  Elizabeth has been my longest friend, although most of these people have known me all my life or have been recently in the past 5-10 years added to my life in ways I could never describe.  They are all so very special and I love them all. 

"Every day we slaughter our finest impulses. That is why we get a heartache when we read those lines written by the hand of a master and recognize them as our own, as the tender shoots which we stifled because we lacked the faith to believe in our own   powers, our own criterion of truth and beauty. Every man, when he gets quiet, when he becomes desperately honest with himself, is capable of uttering profound truths. We all derive from the same source. there is no mystery about the origin of things. We are all part of creation, all kings, all poets, all musicians; we have only to open up, only to discover what is already there."



— Henry Miller, Sexus ~

Discussing friends and the topic of feeling betrayed comes with the building of our relationships, but as we look back to the many good times we have had, and the incredible moments of knowing that someone is there for you always in your weakest moments, your strongest feelings, and even in those quiet times when you just needed someone to listen, be near, or show up when nobody else would. :)  Why would anyone ever want to risk losing a friend by lying to gain nothing?  Beats me. 

I am going to set out to get a photo with each of these friends and those that I have no photo of at all within the next year.  This has definitely been a character building week for me.  Wow, talk about a crash course in learning to keep my cool through a tough lesson learned.  I am still having a tough time, but as I seek to trust God with all His wisdom concerning the people I allow to let into my life, I know that He will direct my paths.

Until next time, keep seeking for those character building traits that will keep you improving yourself to becoming a happy girly girl.  Sorry guys, this blog is a girly thing, but you are more than welcome to browse and learn a thing or two about we women who dive into becoming in touch with our inner girl so that we can be all that we can be to maintain being healthy, wealthy and wise. 

Some people dream of having a big swimming pool. With me, it’s closets"



 

Matters of the Heart are often
reflected by our true friends

Hugs, Pamy





Ok I'm back - full of character Info

Wow! It’s been a crazy week, but I have been true to my decision to make some changes, hence the reason I have not posted in a couple of days.  I completed my application to USC, that's going well, and I'm on my way to start my classes in May.  I am so excited! :)

I never thought I would make it to the school of my dreams, and although the studies are online, after I moved from California to Arizona, my studies will still be accredited just as if I was on campus every day. :)  When I am in California I will have a student ID to visit the campus.  Never stop seeking to make a dream come true. 

Monica and Eva 2009



I have been dealing with trying to get Miss Monica situated in the drug rehab, but I found out she was given a week free to take care of things she may need to take care of and of course she took the opportunity and I haven't heard from her.  I am praying she will do what's right and stay away from the drugs. *hoping* She’s 24 years old and needs to make the right decisions for herself and her daughter, Eva.  Dear Lord, please help her.

I cleaned out my office and threw out all of the files and paperwork, 2007 and back, than reorganized the current files.  Cleanliness is so next to Godliness.  The 2010 taxes are finally completed and I will finish closing out my California Corporation next week.  I'm still seeking a bigger opportunity here in Arizona, and I have Faith it will come in due time. 

So now it's time to start looking to the weekend.  Thank God it's Friday.  We have plans with my cousin Vince and his wife Julie this weekend.  It will be nice to relax a little and visit with family on Saturday afternoon/evening.  I think I'd like to get out and about for a few hours and browse through some yard sales. I haven't eaten out for breakfast in a while and think I will treat Eric and me to an egg and cheese on flatbread with lite mayo, spinach, tomatoes, purple onion, and sweet onion sauce from Subway followed by a caramel macchiato from Starbucks.  We have a nice little outside sitting area in the shopping center where we could enjoy a nice conversation with our yummy Subway and Starbucks selections.  We don't go to church every Sunday, but I   love the worship service at our local Calvary church, so I think Sunday morning I will plan to attend and honor the Lord this Sunday in worship.

Well working on my attitude this past week has been great!  I am feeling so much more alive and together in my daily tasks and it's helping me to build a more positive character.  I've already started the process of working on my character too by changing my attitude.  Keeping a positive attitude allows us to present our personality in a much more genuine way.  I am so delighted to have completed the dreaded chores of cleaning out the prior years' of built up files in my office, as well as the negative perspectives of past challenges. 

My life is getting better and better every day as I learn to keep in mind what a wonderful world this is.  I am thankful for the knowledge God gives us in His word.  For those of you that don't know me, I love to read the Proverbs and the Psalms every day.  I read the Proverb Chapter of the day, and five Psalms a day to complete the books of Wisdom and Praise every month and then start all over again every month.  It's much more informative than reading the newspaper.  The scripture are always full of instruction and beautiful words that help to me positive and full of faith.

        Pro 25:11 A word fitly spoken is like apples in pictures of silver.

  

Psa 122:7

Peace be within thy walls, and prosperity within thy palaces.   



Israeli Flag





Victoria and Jennifer 1999
The year their father and I separated


Below are some characteristic traits that I will be seeking to incorporate more into my life.  As I continue looking back on my life and learning to keep myself feeling classy and fabulous, I am committed to bringing out, once again, the happy girly girl I remember from my childhood.  Putting the past to rest of negative thoughts and circumstances is good, but we should always take the time to make sure that as we put the past behind us we're not throwing away the happy and cherished memories in midst of them. Never let memories get away, especially those that makes you smile. :)  

Here are some Characteristic Traits I'd like to work on or add to my life:

Writing this blog has allowed me to find so many more interesting ways of living my life, and I am excited everyday to work towards the 5 areas of care I spoke of in an earlier post, "girly girl tips."  Today, I feel the change of attitude has given me more energy to keep busy and more positive thoughts that have allowed me to feel wonderful being me.  I think I will try to find the time this weekend to find the information I need to start a garden in my backyard.  I will continue my journey this next week discovering the best way to work through those characteristic traits that need to be worked on, such as sharpening my natural strengths as well as changing my natural weaknesses to becoming strengths.  Someday I will be made perfect, but until that day I am truly a miraculous work in progress and a happy girly girl. :)

Until next time, keep smiling and taking care of all those amazing qualities in you, and don't forget to make some changes, go for a bike ride, clean out a closet, browse through yard sales or a thrift store, and take yourself on a breakfast/coffee date, drag along your spouse, if you have one.  I will be working towards changing all that I can to make my life a happier, healthier one, by finding more girly girl ways to laugh.  Remember what Audrey Hepburn said, "Happy girls are the prettiest girls."  :)

      Hugs,
         Pamy                    

 

Today is a good Day!!


Busy living in Girl World, just being girly-girls.  We are kindred spirits to loving life with ribbons, bows, and lace. 


Our attitude toward life determines life's attitude towards us

A smile from God in our Arizona skies. :)

Well, today has been an incredible day.  I started my day out talking with Monica, on the phone, it's so nice to hear her voice and know that she has been given another chance to do right.  I have faith in her and I know she is trying hard.  I wrote a letter of encouragment to Miss Victoria, and she told me that it was too long, that it took her a long time to read it.  Jennifer just skips in and out of the house, usually with one of her plastics, uhh I mean girlfriends, (lol :p) getting done what she has to and then it's "Mom, we are walking to the yogurt store, ok?"  I ask her, did you get your room cleaned?" She replies, "yes and I started the dishwasher too, so we're leaving."  I tell her to be safe and she replies with "I love you, bye."



Eric 2010



I have to laugh for a moment, as I think of each time one of the girls make a remark of anything being too hard or too long, my husband, Eric, sings to the tune of Crazy by Patsy Cline, "Lazy"  LOL  I don't know, maybe not that funny, you'd have to be there to get the full effect of the the girls rolling their eyes, as they pretend to ignore him. :)  Poor Eric, he lives in girl world and puts up with a lot from all of us.  I guess we can let him have his little snyde remarks as he sits in the corner, doing whatever it is he does on the computer or in the garage.  He gets enough guy time while he's out 5 days a week driving that big truck, and we do let him bar-b-que once in a while, what is it with guys and bar-b-ques?  I'll never get it. *Shrugs Shoulders*   

Monica is doing well since being released from jail.  She is working to maintain her sobriety and is checking into a Christian Rehab Center today.  She will be on lock-down for two weeks; however she will be getting all the drug treatment and Christian counseling she needs to rebuild a healthy lifestyle.



Miss Monica at 16 years old :)



To Monica:  My prayers and thoughts are with you my dear sweet Monica, as I pray to the good Lord to bless you with courage and strength to walk this journey of sobriety into recovery.  I love you and I hope that you find the peace you need, with God, to make it through this challenging beginning of finding that inner girly-girl that has what it takes to be beautiful and free. :)  

I know that Monica will snap out of this irresponsible state she has ended up in very soon, as her attitude has changed so much.  She is different this time, and I can't believe how grown-up she sounds, all of the sudden.  I just know that once she completes all the challenges of walking completely away from the poor choices she has made she will be a strong healthy woman, ready to learn the value in connecting her inner girl with her choices to do right.

My daughter, Victoria, is 17 and she is in such a hurry to find a purpose for her life, and I am fighting myself from becoming too controlling and yet, doing all that I can to stay in constant communication with her.  I wrote her a letter today and conveyed to her what I have learned that God wants from us.  I told her that we are daughters of an Almighty God and with that privilidge comes responisibility.  We are responsible to be true to God and to ourselves by organizing our lives to be real and honest with who we are.  We are females, women and girls that deserve to be respected and treated as princesses.  One thing in life is that we can't be a princess if we run around playing in the gutter.  

Little girl outside playing (Victoria 1997)



When we truly expose our inner girl we find that we are nothing like men.  Men are wonderful creations of God and from the man's rib we, women, are created.  So close to a man's heart was not a mistake in God's design, nor was it a mistake that we were taken from the weakest area of the man's body.  We are suppoed to be tender and soft, and we belong safely protected at a man's side, under his arm.  Finding that special softness inside of our girly attitudes and characteristics is the one thing that most real men love about us.  How cute is it, when you see a little girl, so girly and pretty, it's the ultimate cute, huh?  I believe that men are attracted to the inner beauty that comes through a woman's sophistocated way of keeping her inner girl in control, yet playful. :) 

My youngest daughter is Jennifer, my baby, yeah we all know, the true spoiled one...lol  Jennifer is very much a girly girl by nature, like me, her mother.  We just like that girly kinda stuff that makes us feel pretty and look pretty.  She reminds me so much of myself when I was younger.  We just want to stay as invisable as we can to those that would judge us for our girly playful attitudes, and now that I am older, I have to ask, why?  Why are we all so afraid of what others would think?  I like who I am and I have hidden myself behind a mask for too many years, and I am not settling for acting or being the idea of someone else's thought of who I am, anymore.  I encourage Jennifer to be as girly as she can be, and to find that balance of connecting her inner girl with her responsibilities in life.  Jennifer is 14, and this concept has not reached it's level of maturity in her, yet; however I am confident it will, as she grows and finds the value of keeping her inner girl healthy and maintained.

As for me, I'm just keeping busy loving my daughters, working on my Paralegal business, and my venture into Avon sales to help Victoria learn how to be responsible in earning the funds for her driving expenses, since she has this insatiable need to drive her car all over the place, go figure? I guess we all did the same thing when we got our first car, but gas prices back then weren't as high as they are today. :)

So, as I continue to work through making my attitude what it needs to be to keep me feeling and looking pretty.  Laughter is the best medicine, and so I need to call a friend or watch a good comedy to have my good laugh for the day.

Have a great evening and remember to keep seeking to connect to your inner girl and find the innocense that makes you happy and at peace with God, your family, friends, and most importantly yourself. :)  Until tomorrow, take care and be happy!



The wonders of living in Girl World; a reflection of beauty

 Hugs,
Pamy